The Story Behind The Facebook Divorce
The other day Wife was watching TV while I was mindlessly surfing around on the interwebs when a thought popped into my head, ‘Why don’t we change our Facebook statuses to not married?’. Wife and I laughed about this for a while talking about how funny it would be to have it post on everyone’s page, ‘John and Wife are no longer married’. All laughing aside, we decided to do it, just to see what would happen. I’m not really sure if this would really be considered a Social Media Experiment or not, but it definitely is a fun way for me to pass time, and isn’t that the point of Social Media?
We decided to start off small, I changed my status to ‘It’s Complicated’. I guess, technically, we still have a relationship together so we are still ‘Facebook Official’. Man I love that term. Anyway, within 24 hours I had received a few different text messages asking if everything was OK. Chuckling to myself, I carried on with life, my REAL life.
The next day, Wife decided to change her status. Now Wife was in a complicated relationship with John. Now things started to get interesting. I stopped receiving messages but she got flooded. People making sure she was OK, and a few of the smarter ones even thought it was me messing with people.
A few days later, I changed our statuses to Single. Let the fun begin. The calls came in, the whisperings behind our backs began, and now our poor friends were even starting to get bothered by this. I had to inform a few of my buddies of what was going on, so they could play along better and Wife did the same.
As to not take it too far, I decided to make a public service announcement. It was a bit too long to post on a normal Facebook wall post, so I had to create a ‘Note’, I also made a Facebook Divorce Announcement on JohnNemec.com.
As the messages rolled in, I laughed, I cried, it was better than Cats. But the only thing that almost worries me is I may have just lost some Facebook credibility. Like the boy who cried wolf, no one will believe my relationship status ever again. But I guess it really doesn’t matter anyway. Not that I’m going to spill my dirty laundry on Facebook to begin with. Whatever, it’s just a website people.
Popularity: 1% [?]
Facebook Divorce Announcement
For the past week people have been sending me Facebook Messages, Wall Posts and text messages asking me why I changed my status from Married to It’s Complicated and then again to Single. The following is my official announcement, since it’s a bit too long for the 420-character limit given by Facebook.
I’m sure many of you don’t care, but to the few of you that do, Katie and I have agreed to no longer be ‘Facebook Official’. This stems from the fact that Katie has not been nearly as active on Facebook to foster a healthy Facebook marriage. I have also been accused of using the ‘Who Loves Me’ app as well as the ‘How Sexy Are You’ app.
After countless hours with a Facebook Marriage Councilor we could come to no conclusions. So, regret to announce our Facebook divorce. This may not seem like a big deal to you, but I am now losing half of my photo album and am being forced to give up 45% of my monthly Google AdSense profits. I will be allowed to visit my photo album every other weekend and on 3 major holidays (to be determined at a later date).
Thank you to everyone for all of your love and support in this trying time in both of our Facebook lives. And maybe someday Katie and I will once again be Facebook Official, but only time will tell.
On a side note, Katie and I have been happily married for over 5 years, and plan on being for at least another 50, after that there are no guarantees. We have a beautiful son who was not harmed in any of this nonsense. Smile, it’s only a website =)
Popularity: 1% [?]
I know I should know you
One of the most uncomfortable things for me is when I should know someone but don’t. What makes it even worse is when they know me. This has happened quite a few times in my life, and it never gets any easier. Whether you’re at the local Steak n’ Shake grabbing a cup of coffee with friends or at some store grabbing some toothpaste, you never know when it will happen. From behind someone says, “Hey, John, how you been buddy”, or something similar. You turn, stare, and look like an idiot when you don’t know what to say at the person you swear you’ve never met in your life.
My kid had his first day of soccer on Saturday and he was very excited. He knew his two best friends would be there and he love to hang out with them. He’s grown up with these two kids, since the age of 6 months they have been in the same daycare together. Now at 3 they are almost like brothers.
When we arrived at soccer I had already met both of the kids parents except for one of the kids father. He introduced himself to me and them men folk separated themselves and began talking. The father I already knew, we’ll call him the Fisherman, was talking about his coaching position for the varsity team on a prominent St. Louis private high school. I mentioned that I was cut from the DeSmet team during tryouts my freshmen year and never tried again. The other father, the Accountant, said he went to DeSmet as well. In typical St. Louis fashion, once you know where someone went to high school, you ask what year. The Accountant graduated the same year as me. Awkward.
Luckily, after talking for a few minutes, we realized that we didn’t hang out in the same social circles and really didn’t remember each other. But it’s still bad since there were only 250+ students in our graduating class.
After I got home I busted out the old yearbook and noticed that the Accountant was an honor student and an athlete. I, on the other-hand, was the opposite. A non-athletic geek in the dumb classes. In a sick sort of way it made me feel a little better. Not to mention that it’s been 13 years.
The Accountant is a really nice guy, and I hope to see him again at a birthday party or soccer practice or whatever. If anything, just to explain that I’m not an arrogant SOB, but we could never have know each other due to the fact that our social circles would never have allowed it.
Ahh, high school, if you weren’t in the cool crowd, you were permanently scarred. I wear my scars with honor, I survived.
Popularity: 1% [?]
